You can buy (almost) anything on the internet. But not a cadaver.

Halloween’s over, but it’s never too early to start preparing for next year.  How about creating your own creepy biology lab where you and your friends can dissect real sheep brains and cow eyes?  Cure your nostalgia for the fun days of high school bio lab by ordering your own supplies online.  They’re cheap, and perhaps surprisingly, you don’t actually need any sort of teaching license to purchase these.  But wear gloves, please.  Formaldehyde is nasty stuff.

Sheep Brain
For just $15.95 each, you can order up to six sheep brains from RedReef.com (but only if you live in the United States.)  For optimal study of neuroanatomy, these include the meninges and cranial nerves.  Perhaps you’re wondering where to store your sheep brain.  I’ve found a salsa jar to be the perfect size and shape; just remember to empty out the salsa first.

Sheep Heart
Can’t buy me love…but a heart, that’s purchasable.  How about a sheep heart for $3.60?  It’s almost the same size as a human heart.  Now how’s that for a Valentine’s Day gift idea?  You can thank me later.

Cow Eye
These cow eyes are just $2.40 each, or $2 if you buy 10 or more!  I bet you can’t think of a better way to spend $20 than buying 10 cow eyes.  Cow eyes are actually quite similar to the human eye, despite what this photo may lead you to believe.  Dissecting one of these will give you a clear view of the cornea, iris, pupil, and more, plus the uneasy feeling that every cow you see is glaring at you.

Dogfish Shark
Fan of Shark Week? For $10.50, you can have your very own two-foot-long shark specimen.  One purchaser of a shark from HomeTrainingTools.com even found “a whole, undigested fish in its stomach.”  Bonus!

Life-Sized Human Skeleton…Model
Unlike the above items, this is not real, but it is life-sized and life-like!  A full-sized model with a flexible spine is $339.99, or you can save a little and get the full-sized model with a rigid spine for $299.99.

GIANTmicrobes
For a less creepy addition to your lab, why not stock up on some plush microbes and diseases?  I am a proud carrier of Yersinia pestis, better known as Black Death or the Bubonic Plague, and my boyfriend has The Clap.  You too can have cuddly STDs and other lovely infectious diseases!  Swine Flu would make a thoughtful gift this holiday season.

Lab Coat
Last but certainly not least, don’t forget your lab coat!  Most are plain white, but how about some tie-dye to liven up your lab of creepy dead stuff?

Cadavers
As for cadavers, you’re on your own.  They don’t seem to be available online, at least not from legit websites that won’t have the FBI knocking on your door as soon as you place your order.  Not for lack of demand, though…this guy is looking for a cadaver for his “rockin’ bash” for “Holloween [sic].”

Note: Neither the author of this article nor Free Radicals endorses or encourages grave robbery, murder, or any other illegal ways of acquiring stuff for your bio lab.  Stick to legit sites like those listed above and you can have your very own creepy, yet legal, biology lab without spending too much money.